We talk sometimes about how we want to be remembered when we
leave this world. We want the guy who preaches our funeral to be able to
say some good stuff, right? But have you ever thought of how you want to
be remembered when you leave the room? We have all been somewhere where everybody
seems to be verbally bashing everybody that’s not there. And it doesn’t
matter how bad you have to go to the bathroom, you are not getting up because
you don’t want them talking about you. Have you been in that situation?
Titus 2:8 tells us to live beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be put to shame,
having nothing bad to say about us. And they should be ashamed. But
you know they are still going to talk about you. And for some people it
doesn’t matter how wonderful you are, they are going to find something negative
to say about you. And you can’t help what other people say about
you. But you can keep from giving them any more ammunition.
I say all of
this because we are going to see what Pastor James in the New Testament has to
say regarding our speech. And the tendency all of us have when we hear
sermons like this is to be thinking all the way through about how other people need to be hearing this. Satan wants
you to be thinking about how much Aunt Bessie needs to hear about holding her
tongue. And, oh, if that neighbor of mine could just hear some of
this… And, wow, that preacher really needs a mirror up there so he can
preach to himself.
And the thing is, I’m quite
sure all of that is very true. But this morning I want you to just
internalize it. Think about how you need to change and don’t be stocking
up ammunition to use on poor old Aunt Bessie…or poor old Pastor Todd! Winston
Churchill exemplified integrity and respect in the face of opposition. During
his last year in office, he attended an official ceremony. Several rows behind
him two gentlemen began whispering. "That's Winston Churchill."
"They say he is getting senile." "They say he should step aside
and leave the running of the nation to more dynamic and capable men." When
the ceremony was over, Churchill turned to the men and said, "Gentlemen,
they also say he is deaf!" Barbara Hatcher, Vital Speeches,
March 1, 1987.
Nobody likes somebody to talk bad about them. And that
is one of the quickest ways that somebody can tell a Christian from a
non-Christian is their speech (or lack of). Because we all know that
Christians never gossip. Christians never bad-mouth anybody. They
never lie or brag or just flat talk too much, right? Well, that’s not
entirely true. In fact, it never has been true because James talks in
depth about our speech and you remember he is writing to his fellow believers
in Jesus.
So, let’s go ahead and turn to the book of James, chapter 3,
and let’s just see what the good pastor has to say about controlling our
speech. James 3:1-12 says, “Not many of you should become
teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be
judged more strictly. 2 We all stumble in
many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able
to keep their whole body in check. 3 When we put bits
into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole
animal. 4 Or take ships as an example. Although
they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very
small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. 5 Likewise,
the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great
boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small
spark. 6 The tongue also is a fire, a world of
evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the
whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. 7 All
kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have
been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the
tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. 9 With
the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings,
who have been made in God’s likeness. 10 Out of the
same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not
be. 11 Can both fresh water and salt water flow
from the same spring? 12 My brothers and sisters,
can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt
spring produce fresh water.”
Casey Stengel was a longtime major league baseball manager
whose unique way with the English language became known as
"Stengelese." He held a position on the board of directors for
a California bank. According to a story that originally appeared in the Wall
Street Journal, Casey described his duties this way: "There ain't nuthin'
to it. You go into the fancy meeting room and you just sit there and never open
your yap. As long as you don't say nuthin' they don't know whether you're
smart or dumb."
President Calvin Coolidge was of the same mind, if maybe a
little smarter. He was known as “Silent” Cal and I heard the story about
how he was at a dinner one night sitting next to a woman he didn’t know.
The woman was very excited to see him and was evidently aware of his reputation
for not saying much. She turned to the president and said, “Mr.
President, I have to admit I bet my friends that I could get more than 2 words
out of you.” President Coolidge turned to her and just said, “You lose.”
And we can probably all appreciate someone who knows how to
keep their mouth shut. And we should all try to do that more often.
But in reality, keeping your mouth closed and never saying anything is
not really controlling your tongue. The secret is to know when to keep
your mouth closed and then when it is time to open it, to know what the right
thing is to say. That is controlling your tongue.
James tells us here what a powerful part of the body the
tongue is and in here I want us to see 3 things. The tongue has the power
to direct. It has the power to destroy. And it has
the power to delight. Let’s look
at verse 1 to see how our tongues can direct.
James says, “Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow
believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more
strictly.” This is not meant to be career counseling
from James. He is warning us to think
through our decision to be teachers.
For that first
church and especially for those coming out of the Jewish culture, teachers or
rabbis were highly respected. They were
very important people and invited to all the best parties and were given the
best seats at all the major happenings in town.
And I’m sure James was finding out in that church in Jerusalem that
everybody thought they ought to be teachers.
Well, I’m sure you can ask any of the teachers around here and they
would tell you that times have changed.
You don’t exactly get followed around by the paparazzi for being a
teacher anymore.
But you will still
be judged for it and that is the point James is making here. When Jesus talked about teachers and
especially when He talked TO the teachers, what did He say? He almost always started out by saying, “Woe
to you!” Woe means grief. “It is going to be grief for you
teachers.” And why would it be
grief? I love how Jesus puts it in Matthew 23:3. He says, “So you must be careful to do everything they (the teachers) tell you.
But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach.”
For teachers, it can be easy to say one thing and to do
another. In fact, it’s easy for all of
us, which is exactly the point James makes in verse 2. We all
stumble in many ways. Teachers and non-teachers stumble. It’s easy for all of us to be hypocrites but
teachers will be judged more harshly.
You are telling me how to have my life changed when your life has
obviously not been changed? That’s like
getting diet advice from a fat guy.
But James goes on
to say that if you are going to use your tongue, your words, your teaching
ability to direct others then you
better be able to direct your
tongue. You have the power to direct
others with your tongue. And you have
the power to direct your tongue and you better use that power. James uses the example of a horse and a ship
that are directed by such small things.
And we read that and we focus on the bit for the horse and the rudder
for the ship. But those are just things
like the tongue is just a thing.
It is the one who
controls those things that controls the direction. I used to live and work on a small horse ranch
in west Ft. Worth when I was about 20 or 21.
The owner had a couple of old horses that he liked for me to ride every
now and then just to give them some exercise.
Princess had been a champion show horse and rodeo queen back in her day
but now she was pretty happy hanging out at the barn eating hay all day.
And so when I
showed up to put the saddle and bridle on, she took it as a personal
offense. She started out by trying to
buck me off but she was too old and I was too young for that so then she would
try to scrape me off of her on the pipe fence.
If that didn’t work she would go under the low branch of a tree to try
to knock me off. And it sometimes worked
because I was not able to control her even with a bit and saddle.
I couldn’t overcome
the nature of that horse. And just like
that horse, we have an old nature that has to be overcome. It wants to control us and make us sin. There are also circumstances around us that
make us want to say things that we ought not to say. Sin on the inside and pressures on the
outside are seeking to get control of the tongue. (Wiersbe, p. 358) But we have to control it or it will control
us.
Now, at this point,
you are probably saying the 3 most popular words that come into a person’s mind
when they read through the book of James.
From the first “consider it pure joy…” to this part about controlling
your tongue you are probably saying to yourself, “But that’s hard!” Let’s just go ahead and all say that out loud
and let’s say it like a little kid would.
“But that’s hard!”
And you are
right. It is hard to do. In fact, I would say it is impossible for you
to do. I was talking to a lady the other
day after the biker church who was saying those exact words. She said, talking about something else, “But
that’s hard! I can’t do that.” And I said, “You’re right, you can’t. But…”
And I got about that far and she beat me to it. She said, “But there is that verse in
Ephesians or Philippians that says we can do anything through Christ.” And she was right. That is the secret.
Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do all things through Him who gives me
strength.” Just add this to the list of things you can’t
do in your own strength. You cannot tame
your tongue in your own strength. But if
you are going to direct others you better, through Christ, tame it or then we
see what happens in verses 5-6. It says, “The tongue also is a
fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body… and is itself set on
fire by hell.”
Our words can start
fires. Our words have the power to
destroy. Proverbs 26:20-21 says, “Without wood a fire goes out; without a
gossip a quarrel dies down. 21 As charcoal to embers and as
wood to fire, so is a quarrelsome person for kindling strife.” We all know somebody that just doesn’t seem
happy unless there is some drama in their life.
I hope it’s not you. But if it
is, let me just tell you, leave that stuff at the house. Don’t bring that mess to church with you.
“Oh,
I’m not that bad, pastor. Sure, I like
to stir things up a bit every now and then; maybe repeat a little gossip or
tell things that make me look just a little bit better at somebody else’s
expense but everybody does it. It’s not
really hurting anything, is it?”
How many times have you heard about a great
forest fire that burned millions of acres only to find out it was started by a
cigarette butt? You know, most of the
time that cigarette butt that is thrown down just goes out on its own. Or maybe somebody comes by and sees that
trash still burning and steps on it and throws it away. It’s the same way at church. I see people throw their cigarette butts on
the ground and most of the time nothing happens. But it is trash and we don’t need that at our
church. Please don’t do that.
And just like that cigarette on the ground,
we don’t need your harsh words, your hypocrisy, your foul language, your gossip
or your bragging. Don’t throw that trash
around up here or anywhere else for that matter. Because while most of the time it is
extinguished by a loving brother, every now and then that trash catches
fire. How many churches have burned to
the ground, consuming the whole community with them because of one careless
word said without thinking? Our speech
has the power to destroy. You must
control it and with the power of Christ Who lives in you, you can.
And while our speech, our words, our tongue
has the power to direct and to destroy.
It also has the power to delight.
Proverbs 12:18 says, “The words of the reckless pierce like
swords, but
the tongue of the wise brings healing.”
Paul talked several times about being refreshed by or wanting to refresh
the saints in Romans and Corinthians.
Wouldn’t you like to be described like that when you walk out of the
room?
Don’t you want people to describe you as
refreshing instead of comparing you to a cigarette butt? Your tongue has the power to make you be
described as either one and it is your choice.
And they both come with a price.
The price you pay for being a destroying cigarette is knowing that you
have done great harm to the Kingdom of God.
And James says you will be judged for that. Flip over a page and read what James says in chapter 1, verse 26. “Those
who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their
tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.” That’s a high price to pay.
And there is a price to pay for controlling
your tongue as well. People who are
described as refreshing or delightful have to pay the price of giving up their
right and ability to gossip or put someone down or to try to make themselves
look better in somebody else’s eyes. The
thing is, the person you are trying to impress as well as the person you are
putting down…probably think the world of you.
Do you know how I hear people described
here at Christ Fellowship? “I just love
him!” “She’s so sweet.” Carol, I heard just last week, “That
Carol. She’s one of my favorite
people.” Why would you try to impress
somebody that already thinks you hung the moon?
Why would you hurt someone by gossiping about them if you knew they
loved you like family?
I’ll tell you the truth. I love it when Jeanna Driver comes to
church. I know she often has to work but
when she comes, I just love it. You know
why? Because she calls me “Sweet
Love”. I know, I know. She calls everybody “Sweet Love” but when she
says it to me, I feel special. How can I
ever find anything bad to say about somebody who makes me feel so special? I would be put to shame, as Titus said.
See, controlling your tongue is not just
keeping your mouth closed. It is saying
just the right thing at just the right time through the power of Jesus. Solomon said in Proverbs 25, “Like apples of gold in settings of silver is a word spoken in right
circumstances.” Let me give you a
few phrases that need to increase in our vocabularies. Let me give you a few apples of gold set in
silver.
We need to say “please” and “thank you”
more often. It makes people feel more
like friends and less like employees when you do. Or how about “I’m sorry”? You can break
down a barrier and build a bridge with those simple words if they are truly
meant. We should say “I love you” more often. I’m working on that. It can be hard for us tough guys sometime but
we need to get over it.
And lastly, don’t be afraid to say “I don’t know” if you don’t know. Why is that so hard for us? If you are a banker, lawyer or politician,
let me be the first to tell you that saying “I don’t know” every now and then
will get you a whole lot of respect from me.
But then again, if a banker, lawyer or politician said anything I
probably wouldn’t believe them.
Oh, there I go. See, I did it. I bad-mouthed people without thinking about
it. That’s wrong. What was it James said in verse 10? Out of the same mouth come praise
and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. Well, through the power of Christ who lives
in me, I can do all things, including not saying bad things about bankers,
lawyers and politicians.
But what if you
don’t have Christ living in you? The
consequences are even worse than not being able to control your tongue. The consequences of not giving your life to
Jesus include an eternity in Hell and no joy or peace in this life. We don’t want people to say bad things about
us when we leave the room. What will be
said about you when you leave this world?
Make sure today that it is, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
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